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10.
Fear of drinking is not a guiding principle of AA By
Tom O'Connell Fear
of drinking doesn't lead to healthy sobriety. Instead, faith in a loving
Higher Power and love of sobriety lead to a healthier, happier outlook.
The
mysterious paradox is that we often attract what we fear. When we
radiate negative energy we tend to attract negative responses from
others. And when we radiate positive energy we tend to attract positive
responses from life. In
self-defense training programs, it is emphasized that a person who walks
in dangerous neighborhoods and looks afraid is more likely to get mugged
than a person who walks with confidence. "Confidence"
is a wonderful word. It's based on the Latin word for "trust."
And it can be interpreted as "sure of oneself." A person who
is confident walks "with faith." Not with cocky arrogance. Not
with blind egotism. With simple faith. So
fear is not the antidote for alcoholism any more than it is the solution
to dealing with violent situations. Nor is fear of punishment the
solution to the sins and excesses of the world. Love is the solution.
Love of health. Love of peace. Love of harmony. Love of self, others,
and God. Actually,
every actively drinking alcoholic is riddled with fear, doubt,
insecurity, and the feeling of impending doom. And every actively
drinking alcoholic is suffering from a love deficit. Instead of leading
an impaired person to sobriety, fear is more likely to lead to a series
of drinks designed to blot out the fear. What
about reasonable caution when it comes to alcohol? Even though caution
has a little fear mixed in with it, caution is based on
intelligence. Using God-given intelligence, a person can make a
connection between the use of a substance and its consequences, and then
make a healthy decision. When you combine intelligence and love you have
wisdom. And that is a key goal of healthy sobriety. The
Little Red Book, published by Hazelden, clearly states, "The AA
program is not founded upon fear. It is a spiritual Way of Life based on
Power other than our own, on faith in a Power greater than ourselves to
overcome fear and other defects of our alcoholic personalities."
Fear, other than reasonable caution, is seen as a character defect. This
book notes that those who think they'll find contented sobriety based on
the fear of alcohol "do not stay sober long." It explains that
people who use fear as their basis for reforming their behavior seem to
have "an unacknowledged desire to drink again." You
might describe the fearful abstainer as a reluctant sober person. And a
better word than "sober" might be the word "dry."
Dryness isn't enough to maintain healthy sobriety. Remember
the old saying that there is nothing harder to live with than a reformed
drunk? What that really means is that it's very difficult to live with a
"dry drunk" who hasn't adopted a spiritual basis for relating
to self, others and God. A person whose life is based on fear instead of
love is a burden to self and others. The
Little Red Book, which is described as "an Orthodox Interpretation
of the Twelve Steps of the Alcoholics Anonymous Program,"
emphasizes the wise use of intelligence when dealing with the presence
of alcohol. "Alcohol can be all around us without harmful effect if
our 'spiritual ground' is right and we are on a 24-hour practice of our
philosophy." Intelligence
indicates that we shouldn't stroll across an interstate highway without
looking. We should use caution instead. So intelligence dictates that
recovering alcoholics need to use as much caution with alcohol as they
would use with any other poison. "Contented sobriety will come
easier when we have learned to take alcohol out of the beverage
classification and place it where it rightfully belongs for us--among
the poisons. According
to The Little Red Book, fear is "nothing more than a distorted
faith in the negative things of life and evils that might beset us. AA
philosophy does not concern itself with anxiety or fear. ...Our antidote
for fear is faith...all-out faith in God as we understand Him. We have
found this to be an effective measure in overcoming all fears the
alcoholic is subjected to." So
overcoming fear is an important goal of sobriety. And the opposite of
fear is faith. To repeat the opening lines of this essay, "Fear of
drinking doesn't lead to healthy sobriety. Instead, faith in a loving
Higher Power and love of sobriety lead to a healthier, happier
outlook." |
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