18. Higher appetites key to addiction recovery

By Tom O'Connell

The ancient Egyptian monument known as the Sphinx may not be such a riddle after all; it may simply symbolize the reality that as humans we are a combination of animal and human elements. And nobody is more aware of this than an addicted person who is trying to recover from a life of excess.

The insatiable appetites that lead to addiction don't just disappear when a person stops drinking, drugging, gambling, acting out sexually, or overeating. Instead, the deep craving for satisfaction tends to surface in other areas of life.

The recovering person may not drink anymore, but often moves rapidly into compulsive caffeine and sugar consumption, sexual extremes, gambling, or overeating. And perhaps all of the above. Typically, the recovering addict has a difficult time finding balance, either physically, mentally, emotionally, socially, or spiritually. The craving to relieve our separation anxiety and attachment hunger is still a challenge.

In our Sphinx like existence we have a body with primitive needs, and the lower appetites that try to satisfy those needs are very natural. But they lead us into excess that damages our lives. In Zen Buddhism there is an old saying: "It is the very mind itself that leads the mind astray; of the mind do not be mindless." In other words, the mind has a mind of its own. Really? Is there more than one self in there? Are we talking about schizophrenia?

No, we're talking about the ordinary everyday mind. It's summed up in expressions such as "I don't know why I did that" and "I know I said that, but I didn't intend to" and "I must have been out of my mind." Our appetites are at work at a very deep level, and they influence what we think, say and do. And often they seem to have no conscience. 

But we have more than lower appetites; we have higher ones too. And those are the appetites that recovering addicts need to exercise. In philosophy these are described as the "rational appetites." The higher self has an appetite for what is good. And when we achieve something good we find happiness, or bliss.

The primitive appetite can be soothed by chocolate. The higher appetite will be gratified after doing a good deed. But satisfying appetites, even higher ones, is temporary. The achievement of the act of love, the grasp on truth, the higher education, the political success, the burst of fame, the winning score, the pat on the back, gives a bright glow which then fades and we're in the present again, living life.

We have in us an urge that doesn't seem to be satisfied by earthly pursuits, even those from the higher self. It's a bit like the old Peggy Lee Song "Is That All There Is?" Her conclusion was, "If that's all there is, then let's keep dancing."

Well, the higher self won't achieve much satisfaction from dancing.  It needs more because it's programmed to search for a perfection that doesn't exist on this plane. So what' s the answer? I think it's found in St. Augustine's comment: "Lord, you made us for yourself, and our hearts are restless until they rest in you." So the answer lies in chasing God, not the addictions presented by the lower self.

In medieval philosophy, the notion of happiness was tied to the act of "knowing and loving God." And the word God also meant "Good." Jesus, whom many of us think of as perfectly good, even said this when they called him good: "Only God is good."

So, when all is said and done, it comes down to the choice between satisfying the lower appetites or persistently moving toward higher goals. And it seems that we need help to carry this off. That help may be described as "God's grace," an unmerited gift. But we have the choice of cooperating with that grace, or ignoring it.

The slogan of the natural appetites is "More is better." The slogans of the higher self include "Nothing in excess" and "Moderation is better" and "Enough is enough." And sometimes there's a need to fast from something, or abstain completely.

Addiction satisfies us for a moment, then leaves us hanging and robs us of our power of choice. So addicts in recovery say, "I have a choice today." What is the choice? We can restrain our lower appetites or let them control us. When we restrain them, we can turn our energy toward the higher goals of love and truth. But even then we can go to extremes, and strive for too much of a good thing. What do you expect from extremists?

Maybe the answer to the riddle of the Sphinx, and the struggle between the higher and lower selves, may be found in some advice from Plato. He compares our appetites to a team of horses pulling a carriage. One horse wants to run ahead, and needs to be checked. Another one is sluggish and needs to be prodded.

The end result? Balance. Harmony. Peaceful coexistence. At least for a while.

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