30. Ego deflation is important in spiritual growth and addiction recovery

By Tom O'Connell

In the early years of Alcoholics Anonymous, the importance of ego deflation was evident in the Six Steps which can be found on page 292 of the book "Alcoholics Anonymous," otherwise known as the "Big Book." Those six steps are: 1) Complete deflation (of the defensive Ego); 2) Dependence and guidance from a Higher Power; 3) Moral inventory (examination of conscience); 4) Confession; 5) Restitution (amends); 6) Continued work with other alcoholics.

Strong influences in the development of AA came from people in organized religion: Rev. Sam Shoemaker, an Episcopal priest, and Rev. Edward Dowling, a Jesuit. In fact, Bill Wilson took his Fifth Step confession with the Jesuit priest.

In AA, and other addiction recovery programs based on the 12 Steps, we see spiritual renewal taking place as kindred spirits share their stories, develop patience, experience reconciliation, work on shortcomings, and continue ego deflation on a daily basis. We see people build self-esteem, and develop honesty and courage. We see people with new ideals, practicing tolerance, and increasing serenity.

AA, from 1935 to the present, has passed on to its members ancient spiritual insights, in a forum where powerlessness and emptiness are embraced, and asceticism and self-discipline are encouraged through meetings, service, readings, prayer, and meditation. AA is a school for love and service.

Essentially, the 12 Step groups offer programs of character development where people identify and deal with their personality flaws, character defects, and primitive impulses. Like St. Paul, they have a "thorn" in their side. Paul's thorn (or what I see as the addictive craving) wasn't removed. So, like today's addicts, Paul was always in the process of "recovering." And just as his Christian mutual help group assisted him in dealing with his ongoing thorn, today's nonsectarian mutual help groups do likewise for recovering addicts who must ever be on guard against the return of the inflated Ego. 

AA's co-founder Bill Wilson referred to the "typical alcoholic" as having a "narcissistic egocentric core." And he said, "The chief activator of our defects has been self-centered fear..." So 12 Step meetings deal with this self-centeredness through sharing experience, strength, and hope. They also use slogans such as "But for the grace of God," "Let go and let God," and "Live and let live." In addition, prayers such as the Lord's Prayer and the Serenity Prayer are used, often while holding hands in a sacred circle.

The God of these programs is described as "a loving God." It is a God who can be trusted. A God who gives grace. A God who teaches instead of punishing. And a God who responds to prayers and meditation. In 12 Step programs this God is very personal and there is no need to adhere to a creed. However, in AA, religious involvement outside the program is encouraged in the literature.

AA co-founder Dr. Bob Smith's simple version of the Steps was "Trust God, clean house, help others." And co-founder Bill Wilson described the "spiritual awakenings" of recovering alcoholics as "a gift which amounts to a new state of consciousness and being." In a spirit of freedom resembling anarchy, liberty for the individual is paramount in the 12 Step groups. The program is "spiritual, not religious." And the only need is for the individual to choose his or her own version of a Higher Power.

The following statement by Wilson is at the heart of the 12 Step recovery process: "As long as we placed self-reliance first, a genuine reliance upon a Higher Power was out of the question. That basic ingredient of all humility, a desire to seek and do God's will, was missing." Bill Wilson affirmed, "Without some degree of humility, no alcoholic can stay sober...." And he emphasized, "All AA progress can be reckoned in terms of just two words: humility and responsibility." As an example of his own humility, when he was in doubt about what to do in a critical situation, Wilson used this question: "What would the Master do?" In other words, he tried to follow the way of Jesus.

After reviewing ancient spiritual insights and 12 Step insights, I see the addiction recovery journey as a movement of the addict away from playing God to realizing that he or she is not God. I see the journey as a trip of spiritual development with prayer and meditation at its core instead of egotism. And I believe that after cleaning one's house and learning to trust God, AA's 11th step is the key to recovery. "We sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out." In other words, one learns to practice the presence of a loving God. And that provides the remedy for the tendency to be addicted.

In addiction, we see a divided self in a state of spiritual decline involving perversion of values, depression, guilt, alienation, suspicion, resentment, disenchantment with God, and a loss of faith. But in recovery the addict finds an integrated self. Not divided. Not split. Spiritual thirst increases as acceptance of the human condition sets in. Trust in a loving God develops through a frequent use of the phrase, "Thy will be done." The swollen, defensive, and often offensive Ego becomes right-sized, not inflated. And this manifests in recovery as an attitude of gratitude instead of greed, and appreciation for small blessings as well as large ones in the journey through the ups and downs of life.

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