37. Self-centeredness is a key challenge in alcoholism recovery

By Tom O'Connell

During this century, Alcoholics Anonymous became a major force for dealing with the life-damaging consequences of excessive alcohol consumption. And it didn't do this by developing a purely scientific program of recovery from this irrational disease process.

At the same time, AA did not deny the physical and psychological components of alcoholism. But the founders came to realize that a wonderfully effective, if not miraculous, "way out" of the problem was spiritual development designed to increase the odds of retaining sobriety once it was achieved.

AA didn't invent the principles on which it is based; it borrowed concepts.  Humility, for example, has been at the root of spiritual development throughout the ages. In AA's "Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions" book this powerful statement is made: "The attainment of greater humility is the foundation principle of each of AA's Twelve Steps. For without some degree of humility, no alcoholic can stay sober at all."

Why is humility so necessary? In AA's "Big Book" these words were written by co-founder Bill Wilson: "Selfishness, self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles." To put it simply, humility is the antidote for self-centeredness.

AA's notion of love and service provides healing for millions every day. And the AA approach reflects ancient wisdom. In China, hundreds of years before Jesus arrived, Lao-Tzu said, "I suffer most because of me and selfishness. If I were selfless, then what suffering would I bear?" He also said, "To take all you want is never as good as to stop when you should." For addicts, the underlying slogan is "More is better, " even if it creates personal disaster. So, for millions, abstinence has worked well as the preferred treatment.

The ancient Hindu text Bhagavad Gita stresses devotion to service and non-attachment, which is the opposite of addictive dependency. "A person who has given up all desires for sense gratification, who lives free from desires...and is devoid of false ego, he alone can attain real peace."

The Buddha suggested, "Cease desire." And he stressed compassion, not self-centeredness, recommending detachment instead of dependency.

In Islam, the ultimate purpose of life is to be in the "service of God." This is done by sacrificing for others to benefit humanity, while not aiming for selfish pleasure.

In ancient Jewish scriptures a large crowd yields to "intense craving." And craving is a key element of addiction. Serving as the role model for humility, Moses denounced idol worship and sensual excess. And he was described as "very humble."

One psalm says, "The Lord lifts up the humble." And in Proverbs we find, "Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall."

Jesus said, "Love one another" and urged people to humbly take up their cross, walk the extra mile, turn the other cheek, and "Give to him who asks you."

In AA's Eleventh Step, Francis of Assisi's wisdom is quoted: "It is by self-forgetting that one finds." And the Twelfth Step reminds recovering people that a survey of alcoholics described them as "childish, emotionally sensitive, and grandiose." The antidote? What else but a change of heart leading to unselfishness and humility?

The other AA co-founder, Dr. Bob Smith, had a short version of the Twelve Steps that went this way: "Trust God, clean house, and help others." The goal? Unselfishness.

Emmet Fox's book "Sermon on the Mount," given to  newly recovering alcoholics by their sponsors in AA's early days, says, "Every spiritual treatment...involves a tussle with our own lower self which wishes to indulge the old habit of thought." But spiritual growth leads to a life "purer, truer, freer, and less selfish than it was before..."

In closing this commentary, I repeat AA co-founder Bill Wilson's powerful words: "Selfishness, self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles." And to deal with this challenge is the work of a lifetime, not just a few weeks of treatment. That's why a spiritual development program that helps people transcend their life-threatening character defects is important for those who are trying to recover from various addictions.

In summary, it seems that self-centeredness is at the heart of the matter when we talk about alcoholism or any other addiction. And the remedy is character development through mutual help groups such as AA. This character development not only helps a person maintain sobriety; it provides a new outlook on life based on positive values.             

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