8. Concerns of mental health clients have great relevance

By Tom O'Connell

"When love is enough" was the title of psychotherapist Stephen Andrew's talk at the 11th Cape Cod Symposium on Addictive Disorders. The addiction consultant/trainer from Portland, Maine, addressed counselors on the risk of "burnout" in their careers.

However, the information and advice he gave is also relevant to people in recovery and the general population. We are all at risk for burnout in this fast-paced society. So we have to be alert to oppression by whichever dominant group puts on the pressure, and we also have to avoid being the oppressor, he told the clinicians.

Any of us can be either oppressed or oppressors. Administrators can oppress those they are supposed to serve. And people at lower levels can oppress administrators with  grievances. Health care professionals can oppress their clients. And clients can inflict toxic  self-centeredness on those trying to help them. This dynamic is found in all walks of life.

When Andrew discussed a survey of mental health clients to determine their major concerns, I could see that their concerns were similar to everyone else's. But since they had become more impaired, their degree of concern was bound to be deeper. 

The clients surveyed reported that their first concern was gaining self-confidence (65%). Second, living a normal life (61%). Third, obtaining a job (61%). Fourth, lessening anxiety (58%). Fifth, cultivating friendships (56%). Sixth, controlling weight ((56%).

Concern about controlling the intake of drugs and alcohol was reported by only a small minority (11%). That doesn't mean addiction wasn't a problem. It just didn't rank high on the list of concerns. Obviously, addiction makes ordinary concerns worse. It lowers self-confidence, makes life abnormal, affects job performance, increases anxiety, devastates friendships, and often leads to weight problems.

The advice Andrew gave therapists on how to relate to these clients can be useful to all of us; "Aim low, go slow, and succeed. Show up, pay attention, say your truth in the moment without shame or blame, and let go of the outcome. Just be true to the moment"

Noting the connection between addiction and isolation, he stressed the importance of developing new love relationships in recovery. Also, he advised therapists as follows:

* Commit to revealing yourself.

* Practice spirituality in your relationship with life.

* Allow yourself to be curious.

* Hear the other's stories.

* See people from the basic assumption that each is a good person.

* Have a good time with the relationship.

* Understand that "I'm not in charge."

He closed with some words paraphrased from Elizabeth Kubler-Ross: "Go to the edge, leave your knowledge behind, and step into the unknown. Then put your foot down...and find solid ground...or learn how to fly."

Stephen Andrew noted that we learn and retain 90 percent of what we attempt to teach, 80 percent of what we experience directly or practice, and 40 percent of what we discuss with others. And where can we get a better opportunity to learn and grow than in meaningful therapy, mutual help groups, and close relationships?

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