38. The "One-day-at-a-time" way of life

By Tom O'Connell

It should be obvious to us that we only have to live one day at a time and then rest up for a few hours to prepare for the next day, but our minds tend to fling us back into the past and project us into the future, often leaving us with a deep sense of anxiety.

Throughout the centuries, the idea of living one day at a time has been a central theme in spiritual development. But living one day at a time is only the beginning. The goal is to learn to live one moment at a time, fully aware and paying attention. In our era this message is integrated into the philosophy of 12 Step programs of addiction recovery.

In Al-Anon, which serves as a safe harbor for friends and loved ones of alcoholics, the "Just For Today" bookmark summarizes some of the wisdom that brings peace of mind amidst the cares and anxieties of life.

"Just for today, I will try to live through this day only, and not tackle all my problems at once." It makes good sense to avoid fragmentation and confusion.

"Just for today I will be happy. This assumes to be true what Abraham Lincoln said, that 'Most folks are as happy as they make up their minds to be.' " If Abe, with all his problems, could live this way, maybe we can also learn to think positively.

"Just for today I will adjust myself to what is, and not try to adjust everything to my own desires." We can choose reality instead of fantasies that lead to frustration.

"Just for today I will try to strengthen my mind. I will study. I will learn something useful..." If I put a healthy focus on myself, then your behavior won't rob me of my peace.

"Just for today I will exercise my soul in three ways: I will do somebody a good turn, and not get found out; if anybody knows of it, it will not count. I will do at least two things I don't want to do--just for exercise. I will not show anyone that my feelings are hurt; they may be hurt, but today I will not show it." If I do these things I will reduce my self-centeredness and avoid a depressing "poor me" mindset.

"Just for today I will be agreeable...be courteous, criticize not one bit. I won't find fault with anything, nor try to improve or regulate anybody but myself." What a world we'd have if we could be kind and agreeable one day at a time, one transaction at a time.

Some more thoughts: "Just for today I will have a program...I may not follow it exactly but I will have it...I will save myself from two pests: hurry and indecision....Just for today I will have a quiet half hour all my myself, and relax....Just for today I will be

unafraid....Especially I will not be afraid to enjoy what is beautiful, and to believe that as I give to the world, so the world will give to me."

The prayer of St. Francis of Assisi is also on the bookmark: "Lord, make me an instrument of Thy peace...grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled, as to console; to be understood as to understand; to be loved, as to love..."

All of the Al-Anon "Just For Today" messages attack the self-centeredness that is found at the core of addictive disease. That self-centeredness is contagious and it can make the loved one of an alcoholic feel crazy. So it takes daily vigilance to cope with it. And we need a Power greater than ourselves to help us through our challenges. That's why a program of spiritual development, shared with kindred spirits, is so helpful.

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